The VelociPastor

The 2018 film, The VelociPastor, is a wild and unpredictable journey into the unexpected. This low-budget, indie B-movie is a spectacle of imagination directed by Brendan Steere, with Greg Cohan, George Schewnzer, and Janice Young starring in the lead roles. The storyline manages to beautifully blend the genres of horror, comedy, action, and fantasy all into one package. This film may not be everyone's cup of tea, but it's an unforgettable viewing experience, brimming with inventive absurdity and whimsy and being a blend of pure madness and cinematic genius.

At the core of The VelociPastor is Greg Cohan in the role of Doug, a troubled Catholic priest who's confronted with a devastating tragedy. During a trip abroad to decompress and seek spiritual solace, a series of bizarre and magical events involving a cursed artifact lead Doug to transform into a dinosaur. Yes, you heard it right - a dinosaur. From this moment, the film embarks on its gallant mission of showcasing a storyline that is as unusual as it is entertaining.

The film's charm lies in its satirical view on monster movies, splashed with a retro-disco flavor to ensure it stands apart from the typical Hollywood fare. With a vibrant narrative that doesn’t shy away from being self-aware about its absurdity, it truly is a category of its own. The film alludes to various cult film genres and tropes spotted in grindhouse cinema, and its inspired blend of horror and comedy, sprinkled with a dash of romance and moral quandary, adds to its unconventional appeal.

George Schewnzer graces the movie with his excellent performance as Father Stewart, Doug’s mentor, providing a delightful mix of comic relief and emotional resonance. Janice Young breathes life into Carol, a smart and independent prostitute who becomes Doug's love interest and encourages him to use his monstrous abilities to fight crime and degrade the city. This leads to an exploration of the moral complexities underlying their surge for justice, combining with the overall hilarity of the picture in an engaging yet unpredictable manner.

The special effects in The VelociPastor draw on the kitsch aesthetic of 1970s and 1980s B-movies. The thrill comes not from gory realism, but from the clever use of limited resources to depict the transformation of a human into a ferocious creature of the past. These features add to the nostalgic charm of the film, affirming its appeal to dedicated fans of cult and B-cinema.

As the story unfolds, you will see Doug questioned about his belief, ethics, and the quintessential clash between his transformative powers and the life of a dedicated man of the church. Doug's internal struggle finds its echo in the actions he takes, converting the seemingly bizarre narrative into a discourse on the conflict between good and evil, faith, and reason, personal desires and social construct.

Laced with uproariously funny one-liners and clever dialogues, the script of The VelociPastor doesn't hold back from making you laugh even in the most intense moments. The soundtrack deserves a special mention too, as it is perfectly married to the action on screen and adds layers to the atmosphere.

The VelociPastor takes on a hilarious and crazy journey. It incorporates the cherry-picked elements from monster movies, martial arts, and creature features, sprinkling them with a good dose of humor and linking them with a cautionary tale of faith and morality.

While its extraordinary bill of fusion genres might seem outlandish, it's important to remember that it is a film made with a love for cinema and headed by a fearless sense of creativity. Taking everything into account, The VelociPastor is a one-of-a-kind cult film that delivers an adventurous viewing experience full of laughs, thrills, and unexpected turns. It stands as a testament to the expression that in the realm of filmmaking, truly, anything is possible! Definitely, a must-watch for those who fancy a taste of the insurmountably strange and offbeat shenanigans.